I’m a happier person when I’m narc’d. When I’m narc’d, I’m more willing to face life head-on. I can’t deny that now, even though it took me a hell of a long time to gain the ability to admit it. It used to bother me, and endlessly.

[To clarify: I am not psychologically addicted to narcotics. Lucky for me, they have never had a euphoric effect as it has for some unfortunate people which drive them to desperation to obtain more. Yes, I'm physically dependent -- meaning when I suddenly go without them, I withdraw just mildly, again, lucky me, but it's all physical.]

Then, I realized — I’m not a happier person because I’m on narcotics. I’m happier because I don’t hurt. Because I don’t have a headache [or at least it's a 2 of 10 and not 6 out of 10 on the pain scale], I’m more willing to speak with people, go out and take a walk, listen to music and dance around.

That’s completely normal, right? Say you have a headache. Maybe it pulses, maybe it aches. You don’t really feel like going anywhere noisy or being particularly social because all of that exacerbates the headache. Normal. So, you pop an Advil, Excedrin, whatever it is that works for you. The medication takes effect in thirty minutes, maybe an hour, so you call your friend and say, “Hey, let’s go out!”

You pop NSAIDs, I pop narcotics. The end effect is almost the same. Your headache is now 0. My headache is now 2. At 2, I’m willing to go out. I might listen to the music at an open mic. I might even go out dancing. Maybe go to the gym, have coffee with friends. Whether I have only a mild headache that day by luck or whether the intense headache is muted by narcotics, reaching a certain lowered pain level allows me to live the life similar to one that you lead.

&that is better living through chemistry.